Talking to your teenage girl about relationships


A young teenage girl will have lots of beautiful and wild imaginations about romance. Girls will be more comfortable with mothers to talk about their relationship than fathers as fathers may turn aggressive paying little or no heed to the feelings of the girl. Mothers put more effort into understanding the feelings and emotions of the girl.

Parents can have friendly discussions with the children from an early age. This will help in developing a bond and gives confidence for them to talk about friendship which should be age-appropriate. The topic of friendships can eventually be extended to romance and relationships. 

  • Listen to your daughter carefully about the relationship without making judgments, if you become furious then this conversation will never happen again in a healthy way! 
  • For teenagers, they think it’s all about love and romance and not SEX. So talk in their language and help them understand their movements.
  • Remember, the teenagers will live in the present and it will be difficult for them to understand prospects

While discussing with the child, give weight to the emotional feelings of the people who are involved in the relationship rather than sex. Your child will be emotionally broken if things go wrong and will take the long term to come to life. The girl should be advised about healthy relationships such as 

  • Respect yourself to get respect from others
  • Don’t lose your self-identity while being in a relationship
  • Know your strength and you are the best in your way

A controlling and authoritative relationship can turn abusive in the long-term. Being in a relationship does not mean you isolate yourself from other friends and keep the partner posted with all your happenings and on the other hand, the partner does not feel the necessity for you to know about his whereabouts.

The daughters need to understand self-esteem and relationship are not just all about sexual desires. If the girls develop a feeling of self- esteem then they will know their value and will not let anybody exploit her.


Written by Renu Goyal

A Child Psychologist, founder of KIDicious – Learning Differently, a child psychological therapy clinic based in Delhi. Have written various articles relating to Child Psychology in magazines like Meri Saheli, Responsible parenting, Psyinsight etc. Presented many papers in national and international conferences.

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